Self Care. Defining and getting clear on what matters

After interviewing podcast guests for about a month now, there is an overwhelming theme I keep coming across… self-care.

During the month of August I found myself in a complete funk. Downright depressed one of the days and it was completely out of the blue, so unlike me, but I could not get myself out of it.

What’s the first thing to go when we are feeling stressed and overwhelmed? Time for ourselves. This is the last thing that should fall to the wayside, yet we let ourselves become a lower priority.

We’ve all heard the saying, “you can’t pour from an empty cup,” and the message is true. But not only that, you cannot pour at all when there is no cup. When we don’t create a solid foundation of who we are, we are

I began to see and hear the message of having NON-negotiables everywhere! From my podcast guests, to the podcasts I was listening to, to my own friends and family. Every sign was leading me to see that I needed to implement this back into my life… now.

And hello! I have been preaching morning routine for how long now? I have made videos about it, I have created an eBook about it… and I stopped doing it? How do you think that made me feel about myself? Like a fraud. Like a phony. Like an imposter. I see now that it was human. It was a human response to stress. When you don’t have the tools or a strong enough why to do something, we simply don’t do it. I knew the value of the morning routine, but what I didn’t know (yet) was the consequence of what would happen if I stopped doing it. And I found that out quickly, in the form of stress, overwhelm, impatience, and loads of negativity.

So lets talk self-care. This is one of those things that is totally ambiguous in my opinion. Self-Care to you could have a completely different meaning that it does to me. So for the sake of my own brain, let’s define it for a second:

Self Care: refers to actions and attitudes which contribute to the maintenance of well-being and personal health and promote human development. Generally its care for one’s self without medical or professional consultation (derived from Webster definition).

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The beauty is that there is no one way. The confusing part for some people is that there is no one way. So, when we talk self-care it can mean taking a bubble bath, or having a full-fledged morning routine. Sometimes you are going to need the whole shebang, and some days a trip to the spa will do it. Our basic needs are always the same, but the deficit in which each area that needs to be filled is ever changing.

I want to give you some areas in your life to think about. This is not to confuse anyone or complicate the seemingly simple concept of self-care, but to get you thinking about all the areas of your life so you can take a glance at which cups need to be filled.

Tony Robbins says that humans have 6 core needs and that happiness can be achieved by meeting each of these. They are: certainty, variety, significance, love and connection, growth and contribution.

I also believe that you can trace each of our actions needs back to 6 major areas of our lives. They are: Physical, Spiritual, Mental, Emotional, Financial & Professional.

As I dive into each of these areas, you’ll find that they overlap and coincide with one another, but my goal here is to give you ideas on how to meet some of these needs with simple self-care actions.

This is important- do not overcomplicate this. Self-care should feel good, its should release stressors and it should leave you feeling lighter than before.

These are some of the things I like to do.

Establish a morning routine: Meditate, Journal, Read/Mindfood, Gratitude, Affirmations and work on my side projects.

Get regular exercise & eat nutrient dense foods! You do not need to be doing CrossFit 5x a week to reap these benefits.

Create a relaxing space for yourself. I really enjoy lighting a few candles at the end of the day when my daughter is asleep, writing about whatever comes to me, or diving into part of a self-development course, or simply just meditating. Sometimes being alone in a low-key environment is all that I need.

Sleep. Make this a priority you guys. New parents have a pass because you may not have much of a choice, but if you aren’t getting regular sleep.

Again, have fun with this and share with me your favorite Self-Care activities!!!

 


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