It’s likely the title of this post made you roll your eyes. Okay, so you didn’t get “hit on” when you were younger… big deal! Believe it or not its not an important part of the story. In fact, its just a story. But there was a big lesson I learned from it. Read on…
Back in my single days, my friends and I would go out to the bars and I remember I rarely got approached by guys. I was never the girl who got free drinks, and I certainly never walked away from a night of bar hopping with a crush, a phone number, or a date.
I’m not trying to toot my own horn here but I felt like I was attractive. I certainly was not the “duff.” I had a good head on my shoulders. People, I had things to offer!! So why was it that I was not receiving the kind of attention that my friends were? I honestly starting asking myself, “How come nobody ever comes and hits on me, or no guys ever come and talk to me?”
If they did, it was somebody who was so completely far off from anybody that I would ever be interested. Sorry to say it but its true!
What was I doing wrong?
I didn’t want to get hit on by random people, or flirt around with random drunkies; but like any single girl I wanted a good handsome guy to come and show me that he was interested in me. At the least, show me that he was attracted to me.
I finally had asked my friends, “How come I never get approached?”
And their response was obvious, yet it surprised me… “because you don’t look like you want to be hit on. You don’t look like you want anyone to come and talk to you, you are throwing daggers. you do not look approachable.”
I have to admit I have the dirty look down to a science. Unfortunately, I don’t know that I’m doing it half the time haha. Call it resting bitch face, or perhaps a guard I put up a loooong time ago?
As this seemingly insignificant event in my life surfaced in my brain the other day, it got me thinking- why is that?
This is just an example, a real life example I can pull from, but the bigger picture is this. you might be asking yourself:
“Why isn’t this happening for me”
“How come I can’t do that?”
“How come I can’t manifest some things?”
If this is the case, ask yourself this instead….
Is this something that you actually want?
Looking back on that time, that’s not what I wanted. I didn’t want some random dude to come hit on me while we were at the bar drinking, have a fling or a one night stand, or let alone that be our story. I didn’t want that.
I wanted genuine conversation, I wanted real connection, I didn’t want alcohol-fueled chemistry.
I only wanted it because I saw other people (my friends) getting it. I thought that I too should be having the same experience because it was happening for them.
Just because things are happening for other people or other people are manifesting things, doesn’t mean that is YOUR PATH.
Ultimately it is not something that happened for me because of 2 reasons I can identify now:
The First Point: It’s not something that I really wanted.
The Second Point: I was an energetic match to the thing that I really wanted.
I was singing the song of this is not happening for me; therefore, I was attracting more of that. If I was putting out those vibes of I am not getting to experience this, I was simply allowing more of that to develop in my reality
2 points here:
You have to truly want something in order for the universe to rearrange and unfold these experiences in your life.
You have to embody the emotion/vibration that is of already having it.
To your infinite potential, til next time!
Listen to the full episode below!!